African Muzungu

People say I’m brave for living in Africa. I don’t feel brave. In fact, a lot of times I’m downright scared. Before moving to Uganda, I had several major fears that I recognized and had to purposefully surrender to Jesus. The list wasn’t very long, but included on that list were an assault and being rejected by people I so loved. It was a bit of a shock to realize that 2 of my major fears came true within months of each other. I’m not going to lie and say that I realize now that I had no reason to fear those things. Let me tell you, actually experiencing them was just as painful as I had feared. The loss, grief, depression, anger, and deep aching pain were all very real. No, I don’t believe God tells us time and time again “Don’t be afraid” because there is nothing to fear. On the contrary, there is so much to rightfully fear that comes from living in a broken world and surrounds us every moment. Loved ones agonize through cancer. Jobs are lost. People lie and stab us in the back....

Last time, I wrote briefly about my unexpected trip back to the States, and after having some time to think, pray, and heal, I thought I would share a bit more about what the Lord has been doing the past 2 months. While in Uganda, I suffered through several situations including the betrayal of friends and also an assault. While I have made some great steps toward healing, I do not believe that it would be beneficial to re-tell or re-live the details of what happened, here or elsewhere. Before going, I had considered the possibility of being assaulted, but never actually thought it would happen to me. And although I would never choose for something like this to happen to me or anyone else, I have had the amazing opportunity to see the power of Jesus’ healing hand at work. So many times we pray for healing. Many times that is for physical healing, and if we don’t get better we often accept it with the thought that ‘God knows best.’ If we are healed physically, we praise and ...